After every atrocity one can expect
to hear the same predictable apologies:
It never happened; the victim lies;
The victim exaggerates;
The victim brought it upon herself;
And in any case, its time to
forget the past and move on.
The more powerful the perpetrator,
the greater is his prerogative to name and
define reality, and the more completely
His arguments prevail.
Judith Lewis Herman from her book
"Trauma and Recovery"
It seems it doesn't matter if you lie or speak the truth, as long as you win. The Narcissist will never give into the fact that he or she is wrong. When something bad happens to them, or justice demands punishment at any level, there is no remorse or contrition. They don't change and don't regret. He is a good actor capable of convincing you that his or her view of life is the right one. The person who is allowed to do the most damage without being accountable for their actions feels empowered by society either by his or her exceptional looks, personality, financial influence or circle of friends. They're often shocked when they run into a wall of resistance and someone says "no" to them.
Title IX is a gender equity law guaranteeing a student has the right to an education free of discrimination. Victims of sexual assault unearthed this law going back to 1972, and petitioned the Department of Education. Some of you might be surprised that this bill was signed into law by none other than Richard M. Nixon. (Who would have guessed?) While most didn't pay attention to this law, the backlog of rape victims having their rights ignored and complaints of sexual assault was staggering on many major campuses through the decades. But most college deans and University boards, were fat and happy as long as the money kept coming in. "After all, our image is easier to protect than the real problem." The Obama Administration discovered many Universities were not in compliance with the law. Most of these universities were forced to take sexual assault seriously, or face losing funding.Now compliance to the law began to be a slow game changer. A guilty person could take his punishment and leave school, (and be thankful no criminal charges have been pressed), but the stubborn narcissist refuses to accept reality. "They can't do that to me!" He tells his friends, "It's not fair!" Apparently male rights activists and misogynists have found an Achilles heel in the narrative. Some are aligning themselves with those 1 to 8 percent who have been wrongly accused. The mockery of gender equality from extremist men’s rights activists, including the National Coalition for Men has elevated their agenda into a voice that doesn't want true justice. They want "winning" on the platform of "unfairness to my gender."
Rape, sexual assault, and sexual harassment is personal. It affects the individual. Many students sexually assaulted on or off campus are looking for a safer environment, not revenge. They have every right to get an education free of the fear of running into their attacker or being harassed and bullied by the attacker's friends. That is a reality. But the narrative from the guilty or their peer group is:
- It was consensual
Peer group victim blaming of sexual assault - She's lying
- She wants to ruin someone
- He's a good guy and would never do that
- The bitch needs to get over it
- Just another feminist who hates men
Being a politician doesn't mean you must be political. Also the President is suppose to be President of everyone. Betsy DeVos was appointed by President Donald Trump to head up the Department of Education, but does not have a background or degree in education. And Ms. DeVos seems to believe the best solution to this dilemma is to give time out to both sides. This fairness approach works well when dealing with children who have a verbal disagreement on the playground. It minimizes the issue and restores peace. You give them a cookie and tell them to play nice. The real gut fear from most survivors and advocates is that Betsy DeVos has a political agenda which runs against the policies set up by the previous President. She told a group of reporters:
Misplaced empathy for someone who doesn't want to feel guilt, and does not want everyone to know about the shameful thing they've done seems to have found a sympathetic ear from Ms DeVos along with Candice Jackson her so-called Civl Rights chief.“No student should feel like there isn’t a way to seek justice, and no student should feel that the scales are tipped against him or her,” she told reporters Thursday afternoon, following what she called an “emotionally draining” series of meetings with college administrators, survivors of assault and students who said they were falsely accused and wrongly disciplined."- - Washington Post July 13, 2017
Betsy DeVos United States Secretary of Education
"She told the New York Times that 90% of complaints “fall into the category of ‘we were both drunk,’ ‘we broke up, and six months later I found myself under a Title IX investigation because she just decided that our last sleeping together was not quite right.’” -LA Times July 17, 2017
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| Candice Jackson is Deputy Assistant Secretary for Civil Rights |
I don't want to see anyone (as I'm sure any advocate or survivor,) become a victim of false accusations. It's just plain old wrong, and survivors can empathize with anyone regardless of gender when it comes to being falsely shamed and blamed. But the rights of survivors and future survivors cannot be placed at stake for the cause of misogynistic groups to score a win. Fairness is not the stick where Ms DeVos needs to affect change. No one who is guilty of wrong doing wants to face any justice or punishment. But there is an idea developing in America that says I don't need to be right, all I need to do is beat the other person.
"When top administration officials seek advice from misogynistic hate-groups that harass young rape survivors, parrot their lies in public statements and work to weaken the hard-won protections that student survivors rely on, it sends a clear message to America’s young people: Your safety does not matter to us. Your education does not matter. We never believed you." -Zoe Ridolfi-Starr NY Daily News Saturday, July 22, 2017Holding meetings so some can feel better serves no purpose in the interest of Justice. Fairness is a principle which holds back the absolute truth for everyone.
Edward R Murrow Journalist Broadcaster 1908-1965
I simply cannot accept that there are, on every story, two equal and logical sides to an argument. -Edward R. Murrow.
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| THE INVISIBLE WARRIOR REPORT: Rape Busters! is out! http://kevinrmcgil.blogspot.com/2017/07/rape-busters.html?spref=tw |
No one should be falsely accused of sexual assault. To lie or falsely mistaken someone of any crime is wrong and should be corrected. Every life is important. The issue is that anti sexual assault groups are using this statistic as a weapon to bolster their claims that all advocates and survivors have agenda to ruin someones life. In the context of my article the 1 in 8 stat means on a average that most people who do accuse someone of this crime on the average are telling the truth. Each case needs to be thoroughly investigated, and a conclusions must be made honestly.
ReplyDeleteFeel free to check out these group on Google.
ReplyDeleteNational Coalition for Men, SAVE: Stop Abusive and Violent Environments, and Families Advocating for Campus Equality, according to Politico.
The National Coalition for Men, which was founded in the 1970s, has a long history of what is now known as “men’s rights activism.” One of the groups’ chapters published the photos and names of women, while calling them “false accusers.”
Harry Crouch, president of National Coalition for Men, has also vocally blamed survivors for the abuse they faced.
Thanks for your questions. I'm not a expert on what what might be call consensual sex remorse, or if there is such a thing. But I do believe if someone is intoxicated to the point of blackout, or not having good judgement, then he or she isn't in my opinion capable of making a rational decision. I've never heard of a case where someone was so drunk that they said yes to sex, and then cried rape later. But then again this is not what the article is focused on. The common sense factor for me is to not engage in high risk sex, or to aggressively pursue it with someone whose thinking could be impaired.
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